We’ve all had hopes and dreams of doing something great, living life to the fullest and enjoying ‘success’ in whatever way that seems to make sense. For personal growth and financial success there seems to be so many things that get in the way. One of the biggest reasons people fail in the quest of their dreams is that they are simply doing the wrong things to achieve their goals. Hence, the book Stop the Rain Dance is designed to guide you through the process with real-world, reproducible methods. However, all the best tools in the world for personal growth and financial success will do little for you if you have stinkin’ thinkin’. As such, I would like to introduce you to the biggest dream killer of all; FEAR.
Nevertheless, I believe that there exist both healthy and unhealthy fears. In my opinion, unhealthy fears or unsubstantiated fears serve no healthy purpose in life and just tend to get in the way of our dreams. Healthy fears, on the other hand, are very useful. They save us from doing the wrong thing. Each of these so-called healthy fears directs us in ways to ensure a safe and healthy future. But they rarely get in the way of accomplishing our dreams. So let’s take a closer look at some of those unsubstantiated or unhealthy fears.
Fear of Loss
Granted, nobody wants to lose anything, but losses are as much a part of life as anything else. Often referred to as attrition, nature has a way of wearing away. Nothing is permanent. Some things will last longer than others, but nothing lasts forever. Why fear the inevitable? Especially at the risk of fulfilling your dreams, taking calculated risks is part of the equation. You know the saying: “No guts no glory.”
While in pursuit of personal growth and financial success, focus on the gain, and give 110 percent to your plan. Remember this, even in the event of a perceived loss, there is always a gain. You will have gained more knowledge, experience, and relationships, which may be beneficial for your next project. Sometimes this is better than monetary gain alone. Some knowledge or experience just can’t be bought.
Fear of Pain
Pain is one of the greatest motivators known to man. It works on human beings and animals alike. It can be a great negative reinforcement for training purposes. Therefore, it is no wonder why the fear of pain could get in the way of our dreams. This is a tough one because the fear of pain can definitely be a healthy fear to keep us out of harm’s way. However, this is usually not the case. I am talking about when the fear of pain gets in the way of moving forward. This becomes an unhealthy fear when considering something as serious as a medical intervention or dental work or as simple as an exercise program to get back in shape. Again, pain is part of life and can be taken in moderation if you desire fulfillment.
Fear of Shame or Humiliation
Let’s face it; nobody wants to look like a fool. Have you ever shared an idea with someone you knew only to hear that it sounded foolish or impossible? Well, one way to rid yourself of this sort of fear is to share your idea with only those who are impartial, like your attorney or accountant. You really wouldn’t care what they think. If you are afraid of what others will say, then don’t share it. Everyone who is capable of out-of-the-box thinking has listened to plenty of negative thinkers and learned to be a freethinker as a direct result.
Fear of Failure
I am not really sure what this is. Perhaps it’s a bit of shame or loss of integrity when we believe in something and it doesn’t turn out as we hoped. Maybe it’s related to a loss of self-worth. If that’s the case, it is you who is judging yourself. Just understand that success and failure occur every day. Nothing really turns out exactly how we want, does it? If you have worries about looking like a fool, I believe that the fool is the one who sits on the side, wishing his or her life was different but refusing to take the action to change it. I truly do not believe there is any such thing as failure. It is all in the learning process of life itself.
Fear of Death or Dying
This seems reasonable enough. Just the thought of dying makes most people a little squeamish. Nevertheless, we are all going to die one day or another. Though we don’t want to rush it, sometimes you may give up living for fear of dying. If you knew you were only going to live another three months, I am sure you would live life to its fullest until then. If I asked you to pretend that you were only going to live for a short while so you could fully enjoy every moment, it would be ludicrous. The reason I say that is because you don’t have to pretend. The fact is that you are only going to live for a relatively short while. Life is short, so live each moment, not each day. Every moment counts. Forget about the future because it doesn’t exist. Live now the best you can and the future will take care of itself.
Fear of Criticism
I like this one the best because I feel that if you are not being criticized, you are not doing enough. The more opinions people have about you, the more you are getting out of life. Remember this: trust only the opinions of those who truly love you. All other opinions don’t really matter. In most cases, they’re only jealous.
Fear of the Unknown
This is a big one. This is probably one of the core reasons people do not take that first most crucial step toward the life they desire. They don’t know what’s out there and, consequently, are afraid of it. It’s hard to even talk about. Have you ever asked or been asked the question “what are you afraid of,” and yet the answer is unclear? This is fear of the unknown. The best thing you can do is to make it tangible so you can get your head around it and then get on with your dream.
I am sure that there are many more seemingly real fears out there or inside our minds. Just remember, unhealthy fear is the killer of all dreams. For personal growth and financial success, understand that, in all reality, fear only exists in your mind. Yes, it is very powerful there, but ultimately, you know who the master is. You and you alone can control what is in your mind. You are either the painter or the brush. You decide.
